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I shared this with my e-newsletter folks on Monday morning and from the encouraging responses that I received from some other mommas, I thought I’d share this with my blog readers as well! Balancing work and motherhood is tough! Read on for some encouragement :)
And since no blog post is complete without a picture, here are two of my oldest from our recent family session at my studio. Goodness, I love the natural light in that place… and this adorable, goofy little man. <3
Are you feeling overwhelmed by your responsibilities today? Then this note is for you. No matter what season of life you find yourself in today, I want to encourage you that you can tackle everything that needs to be done AND set aside time for the things that are most meaningful in life. The first step is to differentiate “needs” from “wants”. Then intentionally build in margin in your calendar. Set aside time for what’s important to you so you can fill yourself up and be healthy. I’ve found that the secret for me, balancing being a wife, a mother of two young ones, running a business, co-leading a local women’s ministry, plus having time for other meaningful friendships and relationships is to build in that margin and stick to it. My life may sound crazy, and some weeks it is, but honestly (as long as I’m getting enough sleep), I’m not overwhelmed because I have time set aside to fill up and meet the most important needs for myself and my family first before adding in work and everything else.
If you’re wondering how that practically plays out in my life, here’s what I do:
– FAMILY: I have two family days marked on my calendar every week. For us it’s not always the weekend, actually rarely, because we work most weekends. But we set aside a day or two every week for us. Those days may be spent doing doctors appointments, errands, or other obligations, but we do them together. I’ve said “no” to a lot of jobs to stick to this commitment because I firmly believe that no amount of money can replace the time that I spend with my family. While we do need to financially provide for our family, at the end of my life I’m certain that I will not regret making less money, and getting by on less, to be able to make a purposeful life with my husband and kids. I want my kids to be able to say that their mommy put them first every opportunity that she could.
-MARRIAGE: My husband and I try for a date lunch or dinner once every week, but it usually ends up being every other week. We work on house projects and chores together as much as possible. I honestly love cleaning or working on the house together as much as I love going out to dinner alone together.
-WORK/PHOTOGRAPHY: I have a restriction on how many weddings I book a month and how many shoots I book a week. This enables me to not only spread work out appropriately so I don’t have a “too busy” week then nothing the next, but it allows me to be able to anticipate my work schedule and income accurately several months in advance.
-FAITH & FRIENDSHIP: Last, but definitely not least, I make time to spend with God almost daily. Most of the time it means reading or listening to a podcast while I’m watching the kids or doing house chores. It may only be 15 minutes here or there, but without reconnecting with God almost daily I start to lose my direction, vision, and ultimately myself. I also want to fight against the urge to “build my kingdom” and make my name famous, but be committed to building God’s Kingdom and making His name famous. I also surround myself with women who have a similar direction in life as I do, women who inspire me, lift me up, and encourage me. When I walk away from time spent with them my heart always feels full even when it’s a time that I’m needed to lift them up during difficult times.
This is not an all-encompassing “solution” for myself, I adjust as needed as my season of life shifts and changes. I also don’t “have it all together”, but I do feel really good about how things are going right now. What works for me may not work for you, but I hope that what I shared may encourage you or give you an idea to help you build in margin in your own life for yourself and those you love. Wishing you a productive week, but most importantly, a purposeful one.
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